Heroism, Altruism And Love

Three major values that have taken a hit in recent years have been heroism, altruism and love. I seek to bring these values back.

A hero is a strong person with good values who uses his strength on behalf of other people, especially as concerns standing up to strong people whose values are not as good as his. A typical fictional hero is Beowulf, who killed a monster that was killing people. A significant heroism in real life has been America's involvement in the Second World War. And closer to home, I have seen heroism performed by my former wife Melanie, who faced danger to life, financial loss and loss of reputation by revealing corruption in family courts.

According to some people, wanting to be a hero is compensation for low self-esteem. The Americans who fought in the Second World War will tell you how full of shit these people are. And without them, the people who believe such things would be chanting Heil Hitler. Why on earth would someone go to war to protect people who believe such a thing? Many of them also think that the people who die or suffer do so because they caused it through negativity in their consciousness. So why would anyone fight to protect them if they will say that the person who did so suffered for their negativity or low self-esteem?

Altruism is willingness to go out of one's way to benefit other people. On altruism, I've heard the claim it is based on being three years old and having everything around you depend on others. There is a problem with that claim. I volunteer for the Salvation Army. The organization does not consist of three-year-olds. It consists of honest, responsible people working hard to make the world a better place. A related claim – that saving the world is a front for wanting to rule it – is also refuted by this situation. The Salvation Army does not seek to rule the world; and Texas Oil and Wall Street do not pretend to be wanting to save it.

With love, we see any number of wrong claims as well. One is that it is search for external validation, which supposedly should come from within. That is completely wrong. Love is not about what you feel about yourself but about what you feel about the other person. Nor is it a patriarchial racket. Many champions of love – from Elizabeth Barrett Browning to Anna Akhmatova to Murabai – were women. And it most certainly is not a narcissistic fantasy. I've known World War II generation households that started with love at first sight and blossomed into wholesome family life and kept going strong when the partners were in their 80s. Maybe the more selfish among the baby boomers would be described by this concept of love. But I have higher standards for myself than that.

All of these are good values that have been misrepresented. And there is a need for all of these values. And if nobody else will make a stance for them, then I will.